Archive for the ‘Marketing’ Category

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Oh my god, it’s full of lulz!

January 4, 2010

Take that you slutty, pornographic, crappy RTS bitch.  You’ve been one-upped.  *points to attached photo*

Whatcha’ gonna do now?

(In all fairness, I’m pretty sure that this game is another Asian grinder with an item shop that you have to use if you want to get any enjoyment out of the game.  Yet, after this ad, I’m certainly willing to go take a look at their game and give a try. XD  Their marketing department knows what’s up, at least.)

(Edit: After looking at the game’s logo and the main page, I remember this game now.  It’s a popular Japanese card game, of all things!  A not too bad one, if memory serves me correctly.  Card games aren’t my thing anymore, but heck, I’ll give it a shot tomorrow, perhaps.)

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When you thought it couldn’t get worse…

July 13, 2009
Wow, boobs much?

This happened.

Seriously, this is just getting *%$@ing stupid.  I’m all for “sex sells” but this is just getting absolutely idiotic.

If I could take a shot in the dark at this, I’d say this is some sort of scam.  The developers of this game are still unknown, the players on the forums are walking around in a daze because they have absolutely no contact with who made this game whatsoever, and the game itself rips off from so many other games.

It use to be called Civony, but I guess that was too close to Civilization (which the game is truly based on) so they changed it to Evony.  But if you look in there, you’ll notice some sprites ripped off from other RTS games, such as Age of Empires.

Expect lawsuits… and if I was a new player I wouldn’t touch this with a 100,000 pole.  There are plenty of respectable games out there on the internet.  If you want, I recommend Dreamlords.

Update: Arkenor found more patchwork than I did.  I just did a look over, but Ark found, well, very solid grounds for copyright infringement and plagarism.

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That’s right, I’m totally being bribed by developers

May 1, 2009

I guess this is just my little beef, but I have to come out with it on my website.

I hate it when commenters say I or Massively are being bribed by developers to promote their products.

No, your daft little conspiracy theories on why we gave a good game a good grade are completely in your own little insane mind.  John Smedley is, in fact, not sending me piles of money via UPS.

You know what, if he was sending me all of the money that people keep saying he’s sending me, I wouldn’t give a damn.  I’d be rolling in it laughing and I wouldn’t be attempting to make my paycheck last from month to month.  But GUESS WHAT GUYS, I live in an apartment and can barely afford television.  Woo hoo!

So I want to leave you with a fun little tidbit of information — something that’s not advertised outside of the Joystiq network all too often, yet I think it should be recognized.

The writers of WoW Insider, Massively, and Joystiq (aka, the Joystiq Network) cannot accept any gifts over 20 dollars.  Now some of you are probably saying, “All right, who gives a crap?” to your computer monitors right now, but this is a pretty big caveat.

Do you guys know how IGN, Kotaku, and other sites get some of their writers to interview developers?  The developers pay to fly them out.  The developers offer hotel rooms, airfare, and sometimes food to make sure that writers get to their press events.  Developers do send thank you gifts and other items to writers as a token of appreciation for all the coverage that they get.  The company does not pay for writers to be flown out to small events thrown by developers.

We here at the Joystiq network don’t do that in order to maintain neutrality.  I’ve personally turned down some nice travel packages offered to me by gaming companies, thank you very much.  I don’t take bribes, and any opinion I offer on Massively.com is my own.

If you don’t like it, sorry, but I’m not being bribed to say what I think.

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Play our shitty game, because we have hot womenz!

April 14, 2009

shittygame1Ok…. seriously… your marketing department officially blows.

Game site or pr0n site?  YOU DECIDE, READERS!