Archive for the ‘WTF’ Category

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Whiskey Tango Foxtrot! (A Modern Warfare 2 rant)

November 18, 2009

FFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.....

Ok… in short… if you guys don’t follow me on Twitter… WTF MODERN WARFARE 2?!?!

I’m not going to ruin the storyline for you guys, because honestly it’s pretty awesome in my opinion… until the end.  At that point, I think the entire writing staff went to sleep and brought in guys from crappy summer Hollywood blockbusters.  Why do I think this?  Well… it’s quite simple…

THE GAME HAS NO ENDING.  No, they pump you all up for what… AN OBVIOUS CONTINUATION TO MODERN WARFARE 3.

I really hate this jumping the shark bullshit.  MW1 has this great and epic finisher that really made you feel proud of yourself.  Hell, even MW2 has these seriously sick moments during the single-player that makes you squee with joy.  (Even though one of the “twists” is easily callable.)  But no, the ending is not only horribly contrived, but it doesn’t actually end.  It just sets you up for the next game in the series, because that’s apparently how Activision wants to roll, so sayeth Bobby Kotick.  Push the games that are doing well down our throats, and make sure they never, ever end.

Plus, Soap is apparently Iron Man, as he can take shitloads of punishment without dying.  Just saying… just saying.

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I HATE INCONSISTENCY

November 9, 2009
dudewtf

Ummmm... what?

Hey everyone!  Sorry guys, I’ve been so busy with project for Massively and other sources that I just haven’t had time to blog!  I feel bad, because I have a couple things I really wanted to talk about, but I felt that this topic was the best thing I could vent on to get me back in the mood of talking again — Champions microtransactions.

But, I’m afraid that saying that line is surely a misnomer.  I’m not for or against the Champions Online C-Store at heart.   I don’t intend to buy anything out of the shop, even when they gave me 400 points to spend in it thanks to my GameStop pre-order package.  Likewise, I’m kinda happy it’s there, just in case I do need an emergency respec and I don’t feel like earning one or waiting for a free one to be handed out.

No, what I’m pissed about is the inconsistency of people regarding microtransactions.  Specifically: World of Warcraft versus Champions.

I alluded to my opinion briefly in my last Anti-Aliased, but I’m so fired up about this issue that I think it really deserves its own blog post.  I hate the fact that people let World of Warcraft get away with fucking murder while they go off and rail on Champions.

To give my case a visual illustration, I like to compare this to the South Park episode where Cartman tries to use “psychic powers” to catch a serial killer.  While he tries to help the police department, the South Park police keep missing the HORRIBLY CREEPY DUDE standing in the bikini and blood covered poncho at every crime scene.  They even sometimes stare at the real killer, only to brush him off while they persecute someone else because Cartman said they were the killer.

Warcraft has come out with 10 dollar pets.  10 FUCKING dollar pets.  Not one dollar, not two dollars, no 10 fucking dollars.  I don’t know any virtual pet you could possibly offer me that’s worth 10 dollars of my cash.  It’s a disgustingly high price point, yet people are sitting there and staring at these stupid pets saying, “You know, I really kinda want that.”  Warcraft’s allure and “OMGMMO” status are somehow blinding people from noticing how ungodly expensive this is when compared to…

Champions Online.  The same Champions Online that outraged people when they offered extra costumes at 3 dollars a set.  Or action figure vanity pets for 2 dollars.  Or, even worse, the favoribly priced $12.50 retcon.  No, somehow this game is trying to steal all of your hard earned cash so Cryptic can roll around with it in their pool of money.

No one seems to notice WoW sitting over there, happily peddling 20 dollar server transfers, 30 dollar faction changes, or these stupid 10 dollar pets on top of their 15 dollar a month subscription.  Everyone’s too busy being outraged over Cryptic asking people for 2 bucks on top of their subscription fees.  I even brought this up in Anti-Aliased, and people were blinded enough to tell me that “What WoW offered wasn’t the same as microtransactions.”

I’m sorry, you’re right.  IT COSTS MORE THAN “MICRO” IN WARCRAFT.

But these are the same people who denounce microtransaction item stores.  The same people who spew forth the notion that MTs ruin the quality of the game because developers are too busy putting their work into making MT items and not the game itself.

They don’t care (or notice) that Cryptic only offered five new costumes and a few icon sets versus the 5 events, new monsters, brand new powerset (Celestial powers), new PvP battleground, and new world PvP introduced in Blood Moon.  Not to mention the changes to the game’s weather and skybox to make the place look absolutely creepy.  Somehow, those 5 whole costumes detracted from Blood Moon’s content, even when Blood Moon offered way more than most holiday events.

Let me be clear — I don’t fight for Cryptic because I’m some rabid fangirl of Champions Online or because I’m getting “paid off” by them.  I fight for them because I think they’re getting the short end of the stick when it comes to public opinion.  I fight for them because I find the lengths people go to somehow denounce them insane, especially when World of Warcraft does the same damn thing Champions did, only 10 times worse, and everyone’s ok with it.

Do I sound like a broken record at this point?  Probably, but I keep saying this shit in different ways because if I don’t, some idiot is going to come in here and attempt to contradict me because I didn’t cover all my bases.  So let me be clear one last time.

HATE THE COMPANY THAT IS COMPLETELY RIPPING YOU OFF, NOT THE ONE THAT’S MILDLY RIPPING YOU OFF.  OR, BETTER YET, HATE THEM BOTH.  HAVE SOME DAMN CONSISTENCY, PLEASE.

*clears throat and walks off*

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Quoth the Raven, “Nevermore.”

October 16, 2009
Squak!

Squak!

So I jumped into the MAG pre-order beta today.  I can’t say anything about the game thanks to an NDA agreement that’s in place right now, but I can certainly still bitch about the community — an aspect of the game that has really nothing to do with the game.

Raven Corporation.  They’re idiots.  No, really, they are.

Now, normally I don’t believe forumfallout.  People say silly things, like “Raven Corporation really sucks.”  (For those of you who don’t know, when you start up MAG, you have three factions to choose from — VALOR, Raven Corporation, and Seryi Volk Executive Response (S.V.E.R.).  Raven is the technologically correct European faction, VALOR is made up of ex-US Military who are looking for work in the private sector as mercs, and S.V.E.R. is the biggest bunch of rag tag Russians with guns you can get in one place outside of Moscow.)

I heard them decrying the faction I was interested in, but I really didn’t care.  Raven looks crazy awesome technological, they wear all black, and plus you can make so many awesome bird names for your clan.  Steel Talon Company, Razor Wing Division, Blackbeak Company — those names sound awesome.

So I kept reading the forums, like the silly person I am.  I began reading the threads that said things like, “S.V.E.R. stands for Super Vicious, Eats Raven.”  Or how VALOR made sure that Raven remembered they were French.  It was a hardcore hate on Raven fest.  Geesh, why bag on Raven so bad, right?

Well, I’ll tell you why bag on Raven so bad.   Holy. Shit.  Dumb.

Of a squad of 8 people tonight, 3 of us were actively TRYING TO DO THINGS.  The other 5 were picking their noses at the spawn point.  S.V.E.R. didn’t win two matches in a row because they were good — they won because it’s really easy to overwhelm a team when half of their people are AFK.  Crap, I was holding S.V.E.R. off of our position during one match using a sniper rifle at close range, unscoped, while running.  I got five kills doing that.  Five.

This is, of course, not counting the lovely way people would drift in front of our APC when we were driving into the battlefield.  The ones who had headsets would then bitch when we ran them over, and our squad leader would say the same thing every time — “Here’s an idea, DON’T WALK IN FRONT OF THE APC.”  This wasn’t rocket science.  When you hear the loud engine behind you and you hear the horn, you get off the road.  Ta daa.

I would forgive them if they got run over once or twice.  Or if the APC was moving really fast and they couldn’t get out of the way in time.  Nope.  It wasn’t either of those things.  The APC was moving very slowly, sometimes turning, and they would walk right in front of it.  Duh.  Duh duh duh.

So, to be honest, I’m not making this post to scare people away from Raven Corporation.  No.  Not at all.  I’m making this post because I would like SMART TEAMMATES.  So if you think you’re halfway decent at FPSes and you promise not to be a complete tool… PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF CAKE JOIN RAVEN.

That’s about it.

(Also… if anyone wants to make a clan… let me know.  I’d like to make a group of intelligent Raven Corporation players. :D)

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People make me LOL

September 25, 2009
...we hope you will enjoy the show!

...we hope you will enjoy the show!

So I just read what might possibly be one of the most misinformed comments I’ve read in a while. It ranks up there with all of the comments that tell me I’m making wicked mad dough from “selling out” and “being bribed” by developers.

So, on a Beatles: Rock Band review, someone had the audacity/idiocy to state that The Beatles are “a tired old band who would never survive today” and that their music “failed to influence any music in today’s generation.” (Search for MushroomStamp on that link, if you want to see the hilariousness.)

Like I said. People make me LOL.

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An open letter to MMORPG.com: Back up your writers

August 3, 2009

It’s not too often that I like to critique another site’s policies or methods, especially a group that is technically a “competitor.”  Yet, after reading a post today on the MMORPG.com forums regarding one of their recent Darkfall articles, I feel that I need to speak out.

While not everyone may agree with it, MMORPG.com’s Jeffery Hargrove is a member of The Exodus Syndicate, the currently leading guild on Darkfall’s North American server.  His piece focused squarely on The Exodus Syndicate’s rise to power on day 1 of the Darkfall launch and how they did it.  While I don’t exactly agree with the relevance of the piece (it kind of felt like a “look at how l33t we are” account) I’m not someone who’s going to call for it to be ripped down.

But, people being people, they are calling for it to be ripped down off of the site for one small, tiny, insignificant problem — he mentioned bloodwalling.  To get everyone on the same page, bloodwalling is going afk next to a wall, which allows other members of your clan to beat on you to increase their offensive skills while you increase your defensive skills, all while you’re not at your keyboard.  It’s against the game’s Terms of Service, but the damn practice is so commonplace that it’s hard to NOT bloodwall, as it puts you at a high disadvantage in combat if your skills are too low.  But, seeing that skilling up anything in Darkfall is an extremely painful endeavor, no person playing the game “for real” can come close to someone bloodwalling… hence why everyone and their mother does the bloodwall.  They do it to stay competitive and not die every five seconds in combat.

The whole mention of the bloodwall is as follows:

Our bloodwall was the final contribution of players too tired to stay awake. Those who had fallen off earlier awakened to a few hours of un-interrupted skill ups.

Now, because people have complained so hard about the fact that he says The Exodus Syndicate has a bloodwall, MMORPG’s editor Jon Wood (Stradden) has taken a second look at the article.  He’s contacted the illustrious Tasos Flambouras from Aventurine and has asked if bloodwalling is against the developer’s wishes and if it is then they will take the article off the site.  In Wood’s own words:

If the aforementioned issues turn out to actually be against the rules we will, of course, remove the article from publication, take appropriate internal action and issue an apology and a correction.

I can tell you straight up that bloodwalling is against Aventurine’s wishes.  I can also tell you that, seriously, every clan does it.  I’m not committing an act of hyperbole here when I say that.  It’s just how this game goes, and I don’t see Aventurine walking in and booting people who do it.  I even admitted to doing it openly in my article, and my account hasn’t been terminated yet.

My point here, out of all of this, is MMORPG.com should not take down this article simply because it mentions a practice that the developer doesn’t want people to know about.  If he was explaining in detail how to cheat at Darkfall, then I would take issue with it.  But, in this article, he simply mentions the practice and that his guild has engaged in it.  That’s it.  He’s retelling what happened and that’s the basic practice of journalism.

You may not like the fact that Exodus Syndicate has been doing a bloodwall, but that has nothing to do with the veracity of this article.  The article is solid.  It happened.

If they rip down this article simply because it contains a word that Aventurine doesn’t like being said, then MMORPG.com is saying that they don’t want to back up the reporting of their writers.  It’s saying that when push comes to shove, they’re going to back down to a developer’s wish simply because an article might cause controversy.  Sometimes the point of a journalist IS to cause controversy, but only when that controversy is grounded in truth.

Bloodwalling HAPPENS.  I have SCREENSHOTS.  You can’t IGNORE IT or DENY IT.

Case in point — if Shawn Schuster pulled down my Darkfall article from Massively.com simply because Aventurine doesn’t want us talking about bloodwalling, I would have been furious.  Shawn saw my article before it went to press and he had the chance to stop it from going up.  He knew the content, but he put his seal of approval on it anyway.  If he would have taken it down, I would have lost faith in him.

It would have said to me, “Why should I go out and do my reporting when someone else can come in, suggest that they don’t like the content because it doesn’t suit them, and then have my article taken down?”  It’s abhorrent.  It’s lying.  It’s pandering to an outside source and denying facts.  It’s dangerous.

You do not rip my article, or any other journalist’s article down simply because the developer doesn’t like it.  You issue the developer’s rebuttal and leave it at that, so both sides get a say.  You really don’t take “internal action” against a writer when his reporting is grounded in truth.  Exodus Syndicate did this, he’s admitting to it.  He’s not slandering Aventurine or making up events.

If you agree with me, then go to MMORPG.com’s forum thread on this and tell them to back up Jeff.  Do it because I can tell you that his reporting is solid and that article doesn’t deserve to be ripped down just because it makes Aventurine look like idiots.

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When you thought it couldn’t get worse…

July 13, 2009
Wow, boobs much?

This happened.

Seriously, this is just getting *%$@ing stupid.  I’m all for “sex sells” but this is just getting absolutely idiotic.

If I could take a shot in the dark at this, I’d say this is some sort of scam.  The developers of this game are still unknown, the players on the forums are walking around in a daze because they have absolutely no contact with who made this game whatsoever, and the game itself rips off from so many other games.

It use to be called Civony, but I guess that was too close to Civilization (which the game is truly based on) so they changed it to Evony.  But if you look in there, you’ll notice some sprites ripped off from other RTS games, such as Age of Empires.

Expect lawsuits… and if I was a new player I wouldn’t touch this with a 100,000 pole.  There are plenty of respectable games out there on the internet.  If you want, I recommend Dreamlords.

Update: Arkenor found more patchwork than I did.  I just did a look over, but Ark found, well, very solid grounds for copyright infringement and plagarism.

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Play our shitty game, because we have hot womenz!

April 14, 2009

shittygame1Ok…. seriously… your marketing department officially blows.

Game site or pr0n site?  YOU DECIDE, READERS!